#28 Judy and Carol

I share my correspondence with my friend, Carol, from my on-line Dry Eye Support Group. Her words are in blue.

Judy, you have had such a rough time lately with your eyes. It causes everything to seem worse.  It’s only a little over a week until you go to a new eye doctor. I so hope that will give you a new direction. Seems like we are always trying something!!! (Or at least buying something to try.)

My eyes were not good Saturday, but fortunately I was able to keep them closed at my granddaughter’s concert. Anyway, I have no clue why, but my eyes were fairly good yesterday and life seemed almost normal. Who knows what today will bring.  That is one of the worst things about this disease; it keeps me on edge. But I am grateful to have good day; they are so rare.

Judy, I wonder how good Paleo is for you. Your emails actually sound worse since you have been on it.  Perhaps you could adjust it some more?? I asked a dietitian friend about coffee and she said a cup a day shouldn’t hurt. I have read so many benefits of coffee, too. But don’t do it if you really think it hurts you. Just sounds like you might need it.

I did decide to cut Diet Coke to my morning one that has caffeine in it. Switched from caffeine free diet to water rest if the day as I am concerned it may be bladder irritant that might be causing night-time issue. Have done that for a few days. Will see. Take care, Carol

Hi Carol, well, it’s good you’re trying new things – maybe something will help. Wouldn’t that be great? As far as a remedy setting me back, I’ve just learned to go slow in case something is irritating. I’m finding the coconut oil isn’t causing a problem, but it’s not curing my eye issues either, unfortunately.

I do notice that my mood seems to make the difference with overcoming the pain. Today I had a rough day – I was outdoors a lot running errands and it was windy and chilly. I closed my eyes as much as possible, but they are burning a lot right now. I pray tomorrow my eyes will be better.

I’m feeling less and less certain about Paleo – although I’ve been pretty good about following it. Today, I succumbed to an oatmeal raisin cookie while running those errands. It was so good – but I still haven’t had dairy, coffee or sweeteners.

Well, I better go put on my hot compress and go to bed. Wishing you a great eye day! Wish it could last and maybe one day it will.

Judy

Judy, the burning sounds bad. I keep having the “if only” thoughts like “if only fogginess would lift” or “if only foreign body sensation would stop” or the biggie “if only I hadn’t had the surgeries.” I know those are not productive thoughts, either.

Mood has a lot to do with it, but it’s easier said than done. Glad you are less weepy. I know I am having a better day if I don’t feel like bursting into tears all the time. I was never like this and miss being “normal” so much. I used to just go about life without thinking about my eyes.

My daughter emailed me photo of beach house they are renting for spring break and invited me along. I went with them a couple of years before my eye problem; such a fun time. Now it doesn’t seem possible to do anything like that. I can imagine feeling miserable and just wanting to be home. It would make everyone else miserable, so it’s better for me not to go.

Maybe you can adapt Paleo to suit your needs?? You have really stuck with it for the most part. I think cutting back on Diet Coke has helped me.  But life is too short to give up everything. And heaven knows eye issues have taken so much already.

Good morning, Carol. Yesterday was a gorgeous day. My eyes were foggy overall, and I was grateful that I had a few better moments where they didn’t hurt.

I had lunch with a friend and she told me that she could see that my eyes looked painful. I rested in the afternoon, but my eyes were still foggy. Today they are, too.

I feel sad for you with the decision about not going with your daughter and her family to the beach house. I wonder if you would be miserable? It seems like you’ve come so far with your eyes from where you started. It is much better than it was. If you follow your regimen there (a pain in the a…) I imagine it would still hold wonderful times for you. The thought of missing it feels sadder to me. I don’t think you would make anyone else miserable – they would be so grateful having you there. And who knows – maybe your eyes would feel great at the beach because of the moisture. Just giving you something to think about. Have a good eye day!

Judy, it is sad to miss beach with daughter and family but I would rather have the good memories of having gone in the past. Hope you have a better day.

Oh, Carol, I am trying hard again to stay positive – I had such a bad day yesterday.

I was really looking forward to seeing two good friends of mine for dinner. But my eyes were very foggy and sore. I put a little coconut oil on the lids before going out in hopes that it would soothe me. Unfortunately, it blurred my vision and I had trouble finding the restaurant where I was supposed to meet my friends.

I was frustrated, but found some parking and had to walk a few blocks. It was so stressful. Even though I was upset, I was still managing as best I could despite my eye pain.

I finally saw the restaurant but had to climb a flight of stairs. I guess with the fogginess I didn’t pay attention and my shoe caught on the first step. I fell forward and landed on the steps, but not too hard. My knees were scraped and chin throbbed. Several of my fingers were twisted but not broken. I sat there and cried for a few minutes – no one saw me in the darkness. Finally, I picked myself up and met my friends. Most of the dinner I was teary and my friends were very worried about me.

My eyes take all of my energy to cope and it leaves little left for coping with everything else. I’ve dealt with much harder things than my current situation. But my eye problem just overwhelms me and I’ve never been in a situation where I’m physically so down that I cannot mentally overcome it.

Today, I’m very sore but thankful I can bend my fingers enough to still type. I was so lucky I didn’t break anything.

Judy

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